Dear Starbucks,

I like to watch the barista prepare my drink.  Mostly because I figure if I’m paying you close to $4 I ought to get a show as well as a coffee.  Well this morning the barista looked a bit confused and half asleep.  Please note this is nothing new for this particular young man.  The following is how my drink transpired this morning: 

My cup was the first in a line of about six.  I saw him put the maple in my Half-Caf Maple Macchiato so I do know it was in there.  Shots were made for my Half-Caf Maple Macchiato.  Supposedly there was one shot of regular espresso and one shot of decaf espresso.   

He looked at my cup and reached for the non-fat milk, looks at the cup, oh it’s not non-fat.  Looks around– damn, no regular milk is ready.  He went to the sink and rinsed out the pitcher, back to the bar, re-filled the pitcher with milk and in to the steamer it went. 

At this point the shots went into a “Triple Espresso” about 3 cups down from mine, on goes the lid.  THREE shots of espresso straight?? The guy probably could have used the one decaf, but probably wouldn’t have been happy. 

Oh the milk is done.  Puts the milk pitcher on the counter – re-arranges the pitchers on the counter.  Picks up my cup to study the particulars again.  Pours in the milk, then proceeds to check a few more cups and add milk accordingly. 

“Triple Espresso” he says as he finally put the triple espresso up.   

Pours the shots that were supposedly originally for the Triple Expresso into another cup.  Ok, back to these cups…. What is this again? – damn no shots for the Half-caf. 

Starts shots for the Half-caf, finishes a few more drinks and announces them.  I’m still waiting.  The shots finish and into my drink they go.  Are they Half- caf? – hell, I don’t know.  I guess I will know in about an hour or so.  Finally he finished my drink and announces “Non-fat, Venti, Maple Macchiato.”  I knew it was mine and wasn’t non-fat, but half-caf, so I took it. 


Please consider making this guy drink some of your coffee before putting on the bar.  Think about this, slow moving young man making coffee drinkers wait longer than necessary for there morning jolt… I’m just thinking this could get ugly. 

P.S.  The Maple Macchiato was yummy, but come on, 30 cents more because it’s “seasonal”.  What the fuck? I’m already paying way to much for your coffee, couldn’t you change the flavor for free.  Good thing you don’t serve ice cream, especially 31 flavors, it could really get confusing. 

Greedy fucks.



  1. Gina Said:

    Well, that kind of makes me feel better about not drinking coffee. Sounds complicated. I guess I should never work at Starbucks. 😉

  2. Meghan Said:

    First of all, I love the title “barista”. It makes me giggle. I also drink half-caf, but I hate the way I sound ordering it.

    And, I’ve had nearly that exact same experience at Starbucks. I think they need to pay their employees more – especially with how much overhead that friggin company brings in.

  3. Stepherz Said:

    You are too funny!

    I get to the counter and say, “I’d like a venti half caff caramel machiatto, please.” It just sounds snobby. I say it and feel like I sound like some snooty connoisseur of coffee. I guess I only think that because I SWORE once upon a day that I would NEVER become one of those Starbuck speople. I most certainly became one of those folks. Oh, well!

  4. Sheryl Said:

    Steph, I know exactly what you mean. I feel so out of place there, but their coffee is so yummy, well the espresso anyway. As far as their regular cup of joe goes, I don’t know how anyone drinks that crap… /snicker.

    My husband used to crack up at me. I would justify my weekly VENTI decaf caramel macchiato when I was pregnant because the larger one had more MILK and MILK is GOOD, right? He still giggles at that.
    … but more milk is good, tho… right??

  5. Jenn Said:

    I am currently pissed with Starbucks. I just figured out that at two coffees a week for Jim and I would be about $1000 a year.

    I don’t know that this really matters or will change things, but I’m in a crappy money mood lately so that’s where I’m at with that.

    Oh yes, and my standard order is a soy milk no foam grande vanilla latte.

    I cringe even TYPING that with the coffee snobbery of it!


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